The Marriage of Avirl Lavigne and Chad Kroeger, and Four Other Terrifying Marriages
    • THURSDAY, AUGUST 23, 2012

    • Posted by: Andrew Gruttadaro

    About six months ago, assumedly the Devil woke up and realized he hadn't done something horrible that day, so he got Avril Lavigne and Chad Kroeger together. That demon seed he planted has now fully sprouted -- the other day it was announced that the two are engaged. The nuptial-collaboration is sure to spill out soon enough. What did we do to deserve this? While the unity of the "Sk8er Boi" singer and the Nickelback frontman may be the first sign of the apocalypse, this actually isn't the first instance of horrid matrimony. We put together a small list of a few more, you can judge which one's the worst.

    Jessica Simpson and Nick Lachey

    In 2002, Jessica Simpson was a lower iteration of Britney Spears and Nick Lachey was the leader of 98 Degrees, a lower iteration of 'N SYNC. So their marriage was basically a lower iteration of Britney Spears and Justin Timberlake getting married, and that's about how excited everyone was about it. But they were in love, see? Hey, speaking of Jessica Simpson...

    Ashlee Simpson and Pete Wentz

    I was pretty harsh on Jessica back there, but man, Ashlee was even less talented than her! And you know Pete Wentz for wearing way too much eyeliner and as being the only bassist ever arrogant enough to act like he's a lead-singer. So that was pretty rough. Also, we're two for two as far as divorces go.

    Jennifer Lopez and Marc Anthony

    Because of this. (Three for three!)

    Avril Lavigne and Deryck Whibley

    We've already touched on Avril's misgivings but what's that? You don't know who Deryck Whibley is? Let me help out -- he's the lead singer of the band Sum 41, the faux-punk "hit-machine" from 2001. That's a barnburner of a couple if I've ever seen one. Annnnnd we're four for four. This is less of a celebration though, because if they were still together at least she wouldn't be marrying Kroeger.

    I guess the old saying is true -- talent really does attract talent. Let us know, did we leave any power couples out?

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