Miley Cyrus's 'Inspired' Is Not At All Inspirational
    • FRIDAY, JUNE 09, 2017

    • Posted by: Jake Holzman


    Look, Miley gets too much hate. She really does. Despite the absurd excuses for music she's put out in an attempt to reinvent herself with an edgier image, she's completely harmless. Plus, she's an incredibly talented singer, and she means well.

    And you can tell that she means well on her newest single, "Inspired," which sees her continuing down the more innocent, twerking-less path she began with "Malibu." And you know what? That single wasn't so bad! It was a pleasant surprise. It's a lot of fun, and it's a lot easier to enjoy her music when she's not trying so damn hard to be edgy ("Hey, everyone! Guess what! I smoke weed and drink I'm so #edgy!" -- what probably happens if you copy and paste most Miley Cyrus lyrics from the past few years into Google Translate, and then retranslate them back and forth between English and another language enough times).

    "Malibu" wasn't an incredible piece of pop music, or anything, but it was at least promising to see her move away from… well, whatever it was that she put out with the Flaming Lips and co back in 2015. So Miley fans: please don't think that this review is jumping on the bandwagon of Miley-hate. She deserves better than that, we're in agreement there.

    That being said, "Inspired" is awful at best and cringe-worthy at worst. Why's that?

    These lyrics are why:

    "I'm writing down my dreams of all I'd like to see
    Starting with the bees or else they're gonna die"

    ...oh, so it's gonna be that kind of song, is it?

    "There won't be no trees or air for us to breathe
    I'll start feeling mad, but then I feel inspired."

    ...Yep, it's totally gonna be that kind of song. Fear not, world. Miley Cyrus is here to save us all from climate change with corny string arrangements and cliche lyrics that sound like the Tumblr ruminations of a twelve year old. But wait, there's more! The singer also has the solution to get rid of all the hate in the world:

    "Death is life, it's not a curse
    Reminds us of time and what it's worth
    To make the most out of it while we're here."

    Wait, Miley… so you're telling us that our time is extremely limited, and that we're all gonna die someday, and that if we all just realize that our time is extremely limited (and that we're all gonna die someday) and just make the most out of life before we die, then everything will be fine? Woah! Mind freakin' blown, girl! That's totally not trite BS that's been written about over and over again in millions of other songs!

    Honestly, anyone could have written this song. The music is cheesy. The lyrics sound like they were thrown together in the studio at the last minute, and the fact that they're sung so passionately is all the more infuriating, because you can hear how talented a singer Miley Cyrus is. But the fact that she wastes her talent on songs like this is, frankly, depressing, and that's not at all the reaction you want from your sunny pop song about being inspired by memories of you and your dad playing in a creek all day. "Inspired" is delivered like it's the next "Imagine," but it comes off more like an unintentional parody of "Imagine." It thinks it's profound, but really it's just a bunch of cliches compiled together in a pop song that's only forgettable because you remember so many other songs like it. It's great that you want the world to be a better place, Miley. We all do. But please, the next time you want to inspire us, try to do it without corny lines like "pull the handle on the door that opens up to change." As if changing the world were that simple, and all we needed was Miley to tell us so.

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