FRIDAY, MARCH 14, 2014 |
Posted by: Matt Howard
Craigslist Job Listing:
Need hot model to dry hump/scissor and puke all over desperately floundering pop star while riding a mechanical bull. #SXSW ;)
If this listing was for a "burly heavy-set dude" I would quit my job immediately to become Lady Gaga's traveling swine. The singer, who put on a masochist's performance last night at SXSW, appears to be frantically hunting for relevancy in today's age of Disney stars gone rogue. Perhaps if Gaga's 2013 album ARTPOP hadn't been a total flop, she would never have needed to undergo a frat pledge's hazing while surrounded by a bunch of neon Doritos signs. Maybe the blue vomit was an homage to Cool Ranch?
Hey Lady Gaga, this isn't art. You're just an asshole.