Will.i.am recently released his first solo effort since the Black Eyed Peas went on hiatus, a delightfully generic David Guetta ripoff called "T.H.E. (The Hardest Ever)" (because he must be getting paid per abbreviation at this point). The music video establishes a few things we already knew; Will.i.am is a slut for consumerism, Mick Jagger jumped like eight sharks this year, and J.Lo is just a Walmart brand stand-in for Fergie on this track. All deaths come in threes!
A quick rundown if you're too scared to watch:
The first two minutes are more commercial than music video. You can't even call it product placement if you're not placing them in a coherent storyline. The concept is literally "Will.i.am is continually traveling in a bigger and better transportation device, like BMW Motorcycles, cars with Beats audio, and eventually, a spaceship."
They found a variety of hilarious ways to not show clear shots of J.Lo or Mick.
The Mick Jagger psychedelic space travel section of the video ruined 1971 for me.
ACTUAL LINES FROM THE SONG:
"I go hard. Statues."
"I'ma go hard like a mothaf*ckin boner"
"This is crazy. Psychology."
"I'm about to go in" - Mick Jagger. MICK JAGGER. COME ON, MICK.
2012, here we come!
Given the options presented here William, I think I'm going to go home.