Several months ago, whenever the "cash me ousside" meme was blowing up, I actually once came to the defense of Danielle Bregoli, the troubled 14-year-old "artist" now going as Bhad Bhabie
. I argued, and still will, that she was being manipulated by a misunderstanding mother eager to use her wild child for 15 minutes of fame, and that no one, NO ONE, should have to be subjected to that quack Dr. Phil trying to psychoanalyze them on live television. Especially not a 14-year-old girl.
I said and believed all of that until about 20 minutes ago. Then I listened to Bhad Bhabie's (that name should have been a clue) new track "Hi Bich (Remix)" and now I hate myself for even trying to come to her defense.
"Hi Bich (Remix)" is bad, just bad, in every way, shape and form. There's a lot to talk about with it, but the one topic that most people are latching onto is Bregoli's callout of general dumpster fire Iggy "I'm Australian so I can say the n-word" Azalea
. In one of her verses, Bhabie raps,
"Bitch don't compare me to Iggy/That old hoe is washed and I'm lit/Wouldn't pay her to wash up my whip (Bye, broke bitch, bye, hoe)."
First of all, damn. What kind of low has Iggy Azalea dropped to in our cultural consciousness when a teenage walking meme calls her an old, washed hoe? Apparently listeners have compared the two to one another because of their distinct vocal styles, and Bhabie is not here for that. Azalea has yet to respond, unless her most recent tweet is some veiled shade-throwing at Bhabie.
If you thought Marilyn Manson's beef with Justin Bieber was bad, just imagine how this would look. A catfight between a 27-year-old woman that the world has forgotten about and a foul-mouthed teenager that the world is trying desperately to forget about. There is no winner, literally everyone involved is a loser, and even those of us not involved are losers, because in some small way we allowed this to happen.
Naturally the focus has been on Bhabie and Azalea, but I want to take a step back and also acknowledge a couple of other people on this track who need to get their act together, namely the featured artists YBN Nahmir and Rich the Kid. First off I didn't even recognize YBN Nahmir's name and had to Google him to find out who he was, and all I learned from that is that he's some 18-year-old rapper riding the coattails of Bhad Bhabie. I know it's tough to get exposure these days, but damn man, c'mon. Next is Rich the Kid, who I have heard of before, and really need to question what he's doing making features on a track written by and for sassy adolescents. This man is my age, 25 years old, working with a fourteen year old, and flexing on the track like he's hard. There's no better way to kill any street cred than by collabing with Bhad Bhabie, and there's no better way to make yourself look like a creep than by jumping on a highly sexualized track involving a minor 11 years your junior.
I don't know how we got here, but every day we stray further from God's light. Now I'm just imagining Bregoli's mother sitting at home like a sad Billy Ray Cyrus, wondering where it all went wrong.