Sometimes, keeping up with celebrity gossip can seem trite and cheap, other times, verbally shitting on a public figure's bad taste in men while throwing your half eaten sub at an episode of The Kardashians is just what the doctor ordered.
For those who value their time and brain cells, but also seek quick, guiltless access to winning tabloid fodder, heres a round-up of some of the most important stories you will want to bitch about this week.
President The Rock Johnson? #Johnson2020
Thought American politics was already a breathtakingly shallow and pitiful shit-show that could only be matched by reality TV? Well, folks, we might be getting a new star at the helm next election. Fast and Furious hunk Dwayne The Rock Johnson told Good Morning America [video above] recently that thanks to the encouragement of his fans, his chances of running for a presidential bid have become "very real." Johnson went on to say, "The idea of me becoming president one day has become a legit thing, people...and if I felt that I could step up to the plate and become a tremendous leader and make a real difference and make change, I would do it," Johnson explained. This news will either make you cheer that the likable movie star may make it to the White House or hate everything when you realize how likely it is he will actually make it to the White House.
Tensions Heat Up in Cooold Iceland for #Kimye
Things between everyones two favorite deadly sins, Sloth and Pride - more commonly known as Kim Kardashian and Kanye West - seemed to be a little rocky on a recent episode of the award-winning TV show Keeping Up With the Kardashians. While filming his new music video in Iceland, Kanye was shocked and disappointed when his wife was nowhere to be seen on set to support him, as Kim K was running late after selfishly celebrating her sister Kourtney's birthday. Kanye clearly was not having it with Kim's bullshit, and she felt awful about the whole thing. Let's hope everything gets resolved between these lovebirds, mostly because there is literally no one else in the world who can match their egos. No one.
Zayn Malik's #craycray and #completelytrue Reason for Leaving 1D
Zayn Malik recently opened up about his emotional verifiably true reason for leaving famed boy-band One Direction. After leaving fans without an answer for so long as to why he would go and break an entire generations heart, the singer said in an interview with Glamour
, "An alien spoke to me in a dream," and that was the final push the singer needed to leave 1D behind and go solo. Well, I dunno about you, but Im completely satisfied and have absolutely no qualms with that answer. Case closed, singed sealed and delivered. Bearing his emotions while also proving the existence of extraterrestrial communicationAll in a days work for Zayn Malik.
Calvin Harris SLAMS Taylor Swift, and #Hiddleswift Tying the Knot?!!!?!?!!?!? #OMG #drama #loveisnotdead #pleaspayattentiontome
The world was turned on its head recently when it was rumored that Calvin Harris and Rihannas recent hit, This Is What You Came For was ghostwritten by Harris then-girlfriend, Taylor Swift. It seems that today, Harris has confirmed that his ex-girlfriend did in fact write the song, and then proceeded to diss Swift and call out his former love in a series of passive-aggressive tweets. This situation is another example of our favorite celebrities reminding us that we can never escape the shallowness and backhanded gossip of high school, and for that, we thank them. Taylor Swift has yet to comment, as she is currently working on the material for her next album as of today.
In other TayTay news, it seems that her and alleged new BF, actor Tom Hiddleston, may be taking their relationship to the next level. According to an insider
Hiddleston has enthusiastically discussed proposing to Swift, and even the topic of kids has been present. If this single marriage comes to be, well then I think its safe to say that fairytales do exist, love always finds a way, and no other problems in the world are important. If it doesn't work out, well then we can expect one hell of a Taylor Swift album.