"Nostalgia's a drug," Dylan once sighed through a haze of cigarette smoke. If nostalgia really is an addictive adrenaline rush, then Rock of Ages
is the bath-salts of all throwbacks, recycling the worst trash of the '80s that music lovers across the world have done their very best to forget.
But while whoever the target audience (Glee
fans? the last living member of "The Buggles?")is busy watching Tom Cruise croon "Don't Stop Believin'" at their local IMAX (was that just a triple sucker punch of cultural all-time-lows, or what?), don't hide screaming under your covers! Luckily, there are tons of safe ways to get your nostalgia fix, and sigh about how much BETTER music was way back when and have you heard that terrible band One Direction and hey, what's wrong with kids today?
Rock Of Ages pre-roll is purely coincidental and painfully ironic.
1. Rediscover Yellow Submarine
The requital Beatle reference. Watch it, single along, revel, what have you. Here's the remastered trailer if you're not convinced.
2. Watch The Graduate
The movie that defined a lost generation of boys longing to be men tirelessly working through their complexes by sleeping with middle-aged temptresses. Simon and Garfunkel at their finest, propriety at its must delightfully low.
3. Pop in the "I'm Not There" soundtrack.
An ode to nostalgia for the king of nostalgia himself, this soundtrack gives a jaw dropping VIP list of contemporary musicians the chance to put their own spin on Dylan's classics. We've got Sonic Youth singing "I'm Not There," Cat Power with "Stuck Inside of Mobile With the Memphis Blues Again," and too many more to name. Is this real life? Viva Dylan's glory days. Listen and fall in love with his poetry all over again, and let's forget that the 2009 Christmas CD ever happened. Or sit down and watch the fun (if rambling) flick, and see Cate Blanchett nearly out-Dylan Dylan.
4. Watch Stop Making Sense
, Johnathan Demme's labor of love for The Talking Heads, filmed over three days of concerts in 1983. Make like you're front row center during the band's glory days.
5. Time for the shameless plug: Check out one of Baeblemusic's earliest videos of the tragically beautiful Alexi Murdoch here
Sure, 2007 is only a half decade out of grasp, but it's never too early to indulge.
Enjoy a pain-free trip down memory lane. And remember, avoid contact with all living known Journey fans!