Music Festival PSA: Your Bra Is Not A Shirt
  • TUESDAY, JUNE 10, 2014

  • Posted by: K. Hess

In light of recent events, namely the sweat fest that is NYC's Governors Ball, Baeble has decided to sponsor a very important Public Service Announcement for all young women who may be confused about the function of their underwear. There seems to be an epidemic sweeping the festival going teenage girl population: flimsy lace bralettes as shirts.

RISKS MAY INCLUDE:

1. ZERO SUPPORT

One Size Fits All = One Size Fits None. Bralettes were made to peek out from the sides of slashed up shirts, or lay silhouetted by beneath a sheer top. Use as directed and you have racy fashion. Abuse and you have saggy boobs or no boobs at all.

2. NIP-SLIP

The flimsy elastic straps of a lace bralette are not designed for coverage in motion. The moment you move to the music you put yourself and others at risk of the nip slip.

3. BOOB SWEAT

CAUTION! Your UO synthetic lace bralette does not breathe. While you may think you are doing yourself a service by wearing less clothing, you have in fact created the perfect conditions for swamp tit. It is a dangerous cutie killer, and it will claim you as it's victim.

ATTENTION: THERE IS A SOLUTION!

Young women everywhere rejoice, for we are not a slut-shaming campaign. By all means, continue to flash those fab abs. We are merely out to show you that there is another way. NO LONGER must we suffer under the oppression of uncomfortable torso fabric. NO LONGER must we choose between fashion, functionality and comfort. LADIES, WOMEN, GIRLS: I give you, the crop top.




Let's review. THIS IS NOT A SHIRT:




THIS IS A SHIRT:




The more you know, brought to you by the concerned citizens of music here at Baeble.

Editor's Note: As a male festivalgoer, I do not support this message.

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