8 Artists Whose Real Names Are Better Than Their Stage Names
  • FRIDAY, DECEMBER 19, 2014

  • Posted by: Lily Trotta

Countless celebrities and musicians opt to use a stage name rather than their birth name. Some, like Olivia Cockburn, do so for obvious reasons. Others cant resist the chance to be creative. Here are some musicians whose real names are so darned hilarious/fitting/genuinely cool, that their stage names just look silly.


8. Akon, aka Aliaune Damala Bouga Time Bongo Puru Nacka Lu Lu Lu Badara Akon Thiam
No, I did not fall asleep on my keyboard. Akon's real name is too long for me to retype, but if you look reeeeally hard, you can see the word Akon is near the end there. Now try saying it five times fast. Or even one time, very slowly.


7. Ginuwine, aka Elhin Baylor Lumpkin
Im sorry, but Lumpkin? Even the maturest of ninth graders couldnt say that with a straight face. After going through middle school as Elgin Lumpkin, its no wonder Ginuwine's voice is full of so much tragic emotion.


6. Mac DeMarco, aka Vernon Winfield McBriare Smith IV
Basically Mac DeMarco is a British lord, and I just wish he would own it.


5. Drake, aka Aubrey Graham
Degrassi fans already know that Drakes real name is Aubrey. It's actually a very delicate, sensitive name, so its perfect for the eternally sad Canadian rapper. Besides, the accursed man who brought us YOLO and "Started From The Bottom" deserves a name like Aubrey.


4. Stevie Wonder, aka Stevland Hardaway Judkins
I'm not confident enough to publicly make fun of Stevie Wonder, so let me keep this brief. 1) Stevland is a typo, not a name. 2) Judkins is more fun to say than Wonder, which may have been the problem.


3. Snoop Dogg, aka Cordozar Broadus
Okay, Cordozar Broadus sounds like a Roman gladiator, which is completely awesome, if not exactly good for street cred. Still, if you need a hard rapper name, Snoop Dogg is not what you pick. At least "Broadus" gives people some good material for making innuendos.


2. Nicki Minaj, aka Onika Tanya Maraj
Nicki Minaj is by no means a bad stage name. That said, it's totally unnecessary. Come on, Maraj could have been a really good jumping off point. I can almost see her mirage-themed debut music video; desert, genie outfit, snake charmer, and all


3. Iggy Azalea, aka Amethyst Amelia Kelly
Love her or hate her, you have to resent Iggy Azalea for abandoning what is possibly the best name ever. Like Nicki Minaj, Iggy Azalea is a good name, but Amethyst is so much better! She could be Amelia Kelly, Amethyst Kelly, or just plain Amethyst and her name would still be so much more entertaining to say. "Amethysssssst..."
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