is back and she's as predictable as ever. Releasing her first snippet of new music in three years, the loudmouth Londoner is calling out the pop industry she so desperately longs to be a part of in her "scathing" new video for "Hard Out Here". It all starts with the mother of two splayed across an operating table, a lipo hose sucking out her soul while her slimy suit of a manager looks on wondering, "how does somebody let themselves get like this" (answer: "I had two babies"). After that, it's a parade of Miley-inspired objectification complete with skimpy outfits, twerking, and champagne showers, all to the tune of "Forget your balls and grow a pair of tits / It's hard out here for a bitch." Sing along kids! The big moment comes when Allen reveals her tribute to "Blurred Lines"; balloons spelling out "Lily Allen Has a Baggy Pussy."
Coming from almost any other artist, this video might make for a good laugh, might make you think, might even get you mad about female cliches and double-standards that are at the heart of the song. But Lily decided long ago she would build her career on confrontation, singling out other more famous (female) pop stars she felt were so undeserving of the kind of fame Lily should
have. How are we to take such grievances seriously when Allen's tormented so many artists (Katy Perry, Amy Whitehouse, Kylie Minogue, and Azealia Banks) at every step of her career? Even worse is the wall of pity she's used to defend her attacks. Her comments to NME
a few years ago come to mind ("Oh god, I'm short, fat, ugly...and I hate all these people who flaunt their beauty"). In Allen's world, that's why she isn't Katy Perry. But maybe, it's something else. Maybe she's just not that compelling of a musician, huh? Because "Hard Out Here" isn't here to "save pop music
", as some other outlets put it. No, "Hard Out Here" is four and a half minutes of insufferable, auto-tuned, awful pop music. Which leads me back to that question posed at the beginning of the video; How does somebody let themselves get like this? Fame and Lily's dissatisfaction with never having really attained it. She wants/needs to be famous. When will she learn that her desperate cries for attention are not the way to get there?